Filed under: I’m a happily married man, but recently I’ve started having an affair – with my air conditioner. Now, before you jump to conclusions, let me state my peace.
1. It’s never hot or cold, it’s just right
My wife can go from hot to cold in a minute flat. All I have to do is say or do the wrong thing, and that’s it, I’m sleeping on the couch for a week. But with my air conditioner – I can set it to the perfect temperature and it’ll never stray. What could be better than that?
2. It’s always low-maintenance
I have an awesome LG 12000 BTU Window Air Conditioner. All I have to do to keep my LG air conditioner happy is to change it’s filter every three to six months. I keep it on the energy saver “Auto” setting and it never complains. My wife requires much more attention, from constantly reassuring her those wrinkles only make her look more beautiful to doing all the household chores.
3. My air conditioner is super quiet
The words “wife” and “quiet” will never be related. She’s a constant chatterbox, telling me what needs to be done around the house, how Julia and Jim just got a new car, and which dress looks better on her today. You can barely hear my LG window air conditioner; it’s one of the quietest out there! It simply goes about its business without all that nagging.
4. It comes with a remote control
I don’t even have to get out of bed to turn my air conditioner on and off. All I do is point and click the included remote control. I try to do the same to my wife when she tells me the garbage needs to be taken out and the dishes washed, but it never seems to work.
5. With its 5 year warranty, I can send it back
My air conditioner comes with a 5 year warranty in the event that it malfunctions. Any air conditioner that comes with a warranty is a solid investment. Yet, I can’t send my wife back anytime soon without causing a bit of a scene. She probably wouldn’t be too happy.
Sometimes I think I love my air conditioner just as much as I love my wife. But, air conditioners don’t make me feel better after a hard day at work, and if I showed up at a party with it in hand, I’d probably get some funny looks. I’ll keep my wife – for now.
If you’d like to have an affair on the side – with an air conditioner, of course, check out FFEmax.com. That’s where I got mine. They have a huge selection of low price LG Window Air Conditioners. 
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